It’s time to feel free again. You’ve spent enough time calculating possibilities and doing horseless things. Quit horsing around. Get high and watch a documentary about horses. See and hear crucial information about horses and horsekeeping. See the crucial information about wild and domestic horses. Notice each character of a horse. Watch the horses deliberately move ther hooves. See their amazing face and what they have seen. See the grass they are on and appreciate every moment. Do not be afraid of horses: Understand them. By watching horse documentaries. Take note of beautiful horse faces and appreciate big, strong horses. You must not avail yourself to fine wine, a small snack might be enough. Notice the change. In the atmosphere, everywhere. One day you might have a horse by yourself. Or is it the horse that is having you?

0

We thought you were retarded as we are. So we’re reaching out to you for a new project: Go to the extremes. Stand with a cup of coffe next to a busy street and look everyone in the face. Look at them going to work. Laugh arrogantly. When you’re done, change the place until you have covered your entire ZIP code strategically in a pattern. Give your neighbor’s barking dog a shitload to eat, so he gets fat and too lazy to bark. Go talk to a seaman for absolutely no reason and ask: “So what are you doin’?”, again, with a coffee cup in your hand. Show interest in people. No matter what shape you’re in, try to apply for the special forces. Tell them you can literally do everything – “watch this” – and just run sraight into a wall. Even if it hurts, confidently get up and say “See?”.

There is a lot more to do. Old man yells at cloud. Bring waffles. Bring so many waffles that even your guests are overwhelmed. Create an awkward silence by going out the door and coming back in again with more waffles. Stack them up to the ceiling. Then take out your phone and film their reaction. They might not leave immediately, but they will ask you if you’re alright. It is a good feeling to be asked if you’re alright. Then ask everyone for their credit card number and the CRV. Go to the extremes.

0

You wake up in the morning to take a piss. You look around and wonder what the world is up to after this sunrise. You flush the toilet, wash your hands and return to your living room where you start to brew good old coffee. As you stand there in your slippers and your hands around your hips, you gaze upon the calendar on your wall with a daydreaming stare. You feel like you are open to try something entirely new today: Start worshipping Satan. Once in the morning, once at noon, and once in the evening. Find a sufficient space at home where you can unfold your worshipping ritual, but make sure to acquire the right tools and knowledge to really get into it. Give the black cat in your neighborhood a quick wink so it knows you are new to the club. And remember that you are not doing this because you should, but because you can.

0

It is christmas time, and there are pardeys all around the city. Were you invited for one? Attend it. Bring packets and packets of Salvia Divinorum to it. Like, kilo bags. Lay them all out somewhere and tell everyone you brought packets and packets of Salvia Divinorum to the pardey. Make sure they are at least 50X extract.

Read their reaction. Listen to the increasing silence in the room, then stand ready for any Q&A. The floow is now yours.

Don’t expect anyone to smoke it. Guide anyone away from the thought of smoking it, because it will not end too well.

0

I think you’re just kidding. It’s time to win, and not only win, but to also make delicious chicken dinner. Everything has been empty talk so far, and everyone was only in for the joke. Winning takes time. Whether you’re into make grilled chicken, cooked chicken or any other type of chicken – turkey doesn’t count. A turkey is not a chicken. Win a game and make chicken dinner.

The deadline is 31.03.2024, which is a fair time. It can be prolonged if you beg for mercy.

0

It is not the time to continue walking from now. Floors have many uses, and walking in this quest is not a thing for now.

Try to avoid walking.

You must constrain your mobility to:

– Running
– Jumping
– Sliding
– Crawling
– Climbing
– Moving through Handstands
– On Knees
– On one foot
– Ass Hopping
– Rolling
– Flying
– Floating
– Using ropes
– Catapulting
– Hoverboard
– Skateboard
– Bicycle
– Tricycle
– Monocycle
– Boat
– Plane
– Riding (Dog, Lion, Giant Tortoise)
– Getting pulled or pushed
– Using logs to roll off
– Forklift
– Go-Kart
– Chair
– LEGO robots
– Front flips (difficult)
– Cannonball shot like Dave (“The Bullet”) Smith did

The end date is 21.10.2025.

Show ’em how to do this, just don’t walk.

Get everyone close to you bamboozled.

0

Today’s quest is to get you to write your bullshit for this website. That’s right. There’s a lack of sources and the stuff doesn’t come around by itself. You don’t need to be funny, just post the VERY THING you’re thinking about right now. You won’t be held accountable for any scandal. Do it, right now.

0

Waiting for customer support replies can take long and is annoying. Accelerate it by sending them the hardest porn image you can find. The difference between being naughty and a master of disaster lies within the boundaries of what you dare to do publically, and the best time for it is either at midnight when you’re drunk out of your mind or in the middle of masturbation. Who cares? Asses are getting fucked and dicks are getting sucked all day and all night, so it doesn’t make a difference when you bring it up. It’s not like the employees do the same thing in one way or another if they come home, except if they’re catering to the IT and security area. The deadline is 25. 09. 2024. Have fun! And don’t forget reporting back about it!

+1

It’s time to embark on a journey like no other, my friend. A quest so epic, so badass, that it’ll have you feeling like you’re living in one of those rock and roll movies from the 80s. You’re about to smoke the strongest weed you’ve ever had and change all of your social media profile pictures to none other than… the one and only… Brett Michaels.

Now, before you go all “WTF” on me, let me explain. You see, Brett Michaels isn’t just some washed-up has-been. No, my friend. He’s a fucking rock god. A god among mortals. And if you’re gonna take this quest seriously, you need to start worshipping at the altar of his awesomeness.

So, here’s what you’ve gotta do:

Find yourself the finest, most potent weed that money (or, rather, drugs) can buy. You’re going to need something that’ll have you seeing Brett Michaels in everything you look at. Once you’ve got that sweet, sweet plant matter in your grubby little hands, roll it up into the biggest, most ridiculous joint you can muster. This isn’t the time for subtlety, my friend. It’s time to go big or go home.
Once you’re properly blazed out of your gourd, fire up your favorite social media platform and change your profile picture to the image of Brett Michaels that I’ve provided. Make sure it’s the highest resolution you can find, and that it’s the first thing everyone sees when they visit your page.
From this point forward, all of your online interactions should somehow revolve around the glory that is Brett Michaels. Like, you should probably change your name to “Brett Michaels’ Biggest Fan” or something equally as ridiculous.
Lastly, and most importantly, you must spread the word about this quest. Tell your friends, your family, your neighbors, your enemies, and even that guy who always replies to your group chats with nothing but memes. The more people who join you in worshipping at the altar of Brett Michaels, the closer we all get to achieving ultimate rock and roll enlightenment.
Remember, this isn’t just any quest. This is the Brett Michaels Quest. We don’t have to do much; He will get all the bitches for us. And when you complete it, my friend, you’ll have joined an elite brotherhood of rock and roll legends. The only question is: are you ready to rock?

+3

Are you out of your mind? You have been without an artillery for too long and it is best to demonstrate your abilities before others do. Your artillery, howitzer or missile defense system such as Iron Dome can be built from old to new warfare materials, and the artillery has to be at least 3m in height/length. Make sure your device is not loaded or prepared with any shells because it might facilitate a hazard for ourselves and others. We also offer loads of free beer. The due date is 20.06.2024

+1

It is time to sit back and reflect on what we are. Is everything an illusion? Maybe those are side questions. Try to understand your own mind. Know how the dynamics work and try to explore real-life examples. Take mature and wise steps in everything you do and don’t get fooled by demands. In case of doubt, try to understand the minds of others. The deadline is 28.08.2024 – you can opt out at any time.

+2

Smoke the strongest weed you can get. Find 3 gays outside. Congratulate them. Go home and report here.

0

It’s not hard – just do the same thing you always did, look around, wait for life to start. The hot chicks thing may start in 2 weeks. You will be the successful leader of something that i call “perception”. Become a full blown monk. Produce 5 ass slapping sounds. Prevent one thousand chickens from being killed. Write all the madness in this world on a sheet of paper. Pee into a really loud and hollow plastic bucket in the middle of a night next to someone watching TV at home with open windows. Confuse the hell out of cats. Make yourself known amongst law enforcement. Let a piece of chocolate melt in your pocket. Read a poem to ducks. Grab her right by the intellectual curiosity and symbolic thinking. Fuck up the volleyball match in the astral world. Study molecular biology so you get tasked with a lot of overwhelming shit to do. If you’re shy, send your crush the hottest porn picture you can find and ask “wanna do this?”. Start a random protest against, like, Aston Martin. Try to get off your mom for just one day. Imitate a bleating sheep really loudly when someone’s outside your house. Get some groceries with a drone while not leaving your room. Cut small pieces of apples and mix them with yogurt. Expiration date is whatever.

0

See Something

Bark at it

You have 15 years.

+4

Intrusive thoughts? Programmer? Fucked up life? She’s not here anymore? Print a 3D model of your brain and put it on the desk. Every time shit gets real, you can see your brain externally and understand better what this weird organ/object is able to do to us.

You have plenty of time, but you should do it within 3 years, which is until April 2026.

0